May 2025

Coping with Uncertainty…

It continues…

Describing the current situation in our country as uncertain is an understatement by a factor of 100. The President is implementing unprecedented changes at an alarming speed. Cutting programs indiscriminately, firing individuals without cause, and deporting innocent citizens are just a few pages from his playbook. Unsurprisingly, the populace feels anxious, on edge, and worried about the future. People are frustrated and angry, which are natural reactions to the situation.

So, how do we all cope? Here is one suggestion: don’t overdose on crisis! What do I mean? Events are unfolding daily that cause us concern and worry. My iPhone sends breaking news bulletins at least once an hour. What are we to do? Shouldn’t we be informed? The answer, of course, is yes, but don’t endlessly watch the news or read newspapers. Too much exposure can leave a person in a constant state of worry and upset.

Living your life and enjoying the things you can control is essential. Stay informed, not engulfed. The same principle applies in social situations. Everyone in a social setting is aware of the national crises. A group could easily spend the entire evening discussing the chaotic situation. Too often, such a gathering leaves people more frustrated and anxious than before. Some discussion is normal, but endless perseveration can lead to an overdose of emotional toxicity.

In addition to managing toxic input, it is advantageous to develop an action strategy. Each of us has our preferred methods of giving input. Identify yours and act, whether by writing letters, making phone calls, or participating in marches. You will feel more empowered through action, regardless of its size.

Boston

Charles Street leads
To the Common,
Where swans swim,
And kids play,
As the seasons roll by,
Like a bouncing ball,
Racing down Beacon Hill,
In the time of Summer.

Creativity in Retirement:

One Man’s Evolution

1. Were you a creative person in your early years? If so, how?

I started drawing when I was 9 years old. I enjoyed creating pencil sketches of various subjects. One sketch that I believe I still have somewhere is of my baby sister in her stroller when she was a few months old. I also made sketches from pictures that caught my attention, like eagles and other interesting items. At some point, I began drawing pictures of houses and buildings, designing them, and creating potential floor plans. I thought for several years that I wanted to be an architect. Then, when I was 13 or 14, I read something about psychology that piqued my interest. I was fascinated and decided to pursue that path. So, I followed that direction and obtained my BS degree in Psychology. Along the way, I also began writing poetry regularly.

After obtaining my BS degree, I worked for General Motors for a year and realized that the corporate world was not for me. I took a year off to travel to Morocco and Spain, spending significant time in Marrakesh, Madrid, Barcelona, and Ibiza. During this period, I wrote more poetry and resumed sketching. Upon my return, inspired by a week spent at the Prado in Madrid, where I admired the works of Goya, Velazquez, Bosch, and others, along with my discovery of Gaudi’s remarkable creations in Barcelona, I reaffirmed my desire to become an artist and enrolled in preliminary courses for an MFA program. My future wife expressed her discontent, stating that she would not live with a starving artist in a beret. During that time, I became friends with several of my art professors, and we discussed the meaning of life and existential philosophy. Upon discovering that two psychology professors on campus practiced existential psychology, I rekindled my interest in psychology and enrolled in a Master’s degree program. However, my passion and involvement in art and poetry persisted throughout the years.

Happy Mother’s Day

I recently lost the love of my life, my husband Bill, to Alzheimer’s. We were married for over fifty years and had an absolutely wonderful life together. I have been really struggling with his loss. I can’t seem to pull out. So much of my life centered around him and I have had great difficulty re-establishing a life on my own. It is as though I have no internal resources, no inner voice to center me and guide me.

My daughter April sent me a remarkable letter for Mother’s Day. She reminded me that in the Jewish culture it is customary to wish someone “Live To 120” that means a hope that they will live not only a long life (like Moses) but also a life of quality and vitality. She remembered in her letter things I would say to her and her sisters to help them with the vicissitudes of life.

“Be your own cheerleader”.

“Make your own happiness”.

“Remember that nothing is life and death, except for life and death”.

Tuscan Potato Salad

Summer is just around the corner, so it’s time to fire up the grill. Corn will beautifully complement your burgers, along with potato salad. Here’s a tasty recipe for potato salad that will impress your guests.

Boil the required amount of potatoes. Use golden potatoes.
Once cooled, cut your potatoes into bite-sized pieces.
Add chopped red onion.
Add salt, pepper, sweet basil, seasoned salt, and a dash of garlic salt.
Add a little olive oil.
Add some white vinegar.
Add mayonnaise and mix.
Add paprika.

Avoid using too much of any ingredient. You might need to experiment to find what suits you best.

Later-Life Transitions:

Moving to a Senior Facility

In 2023/2024, the SDPA Aging Issues Committee produced six ninety minute Zoom presentations entitled Later-Life Transitions Luncheon Series. Topics covered in this series included Retirement, Loss of Physical Capabilities, Moving to a Senior Facility, Becoming Caregiver to a Family Member, Loss of a Spouse/Partner and The Final Transition. We are presenting a summary of the material covered in each of the six series presentations in installments .

The third topic Moving to a Senior Facility was facilitated by Cynthia A. Cotter, Ph.D. and Kenneth S. Dellefield, Ph.D. on June 16, 2023.

MOVING TO A SENIOR FACILITY

In this session, Drs. Dellefield and Cotter discussed the experiences of older adults who find themselves having to leave their family homes and move to senior facilities. The transition to a senior facility can be particularly difficult for many older adults to navigate. There are stresses leaving the living environment one has known for many years and that has been incorporated into one’s sense of identity, safety, and place in the world. It feels as though so many memories are being left behind. The transition can be complicated by financial and tax issues and tremendous problems in downsizing. Desires and competitions among family members can make matters even worse.

You may be interested to know that, currently, 80% of those over the age of 50 own their own homes. And of those, 51% have no mortgages. So it comes as no surprise that 87% of adults over 65 say they do not want to move from their homes. They want to age in place. And yet many of those will find themselves unable to do so.

Fidel’s Little Mexico

Tried and true. It’s been around for sixty years, and Fidel’s remains popular and busy in Solana Beach. Why? Well, it has a funky vibe with plenty of tasty Mexican food, served efficiently by long-serving waiters. The restaurant winds around with several small dining rooms.

My favorite dish is chicken enchiladas served with rice and beans. The salsa and chips are complimentary, and the draft beer is ice-cold! Fidel’s gets busy, so go early.

Successful Aging and Subjective Aging

In the United States, by 2034, older adults will outnumber children, and by 2060 older adults will represent nearly one quarter of the population (U.S. Census Bureau, 2018). An understanding of what contributes to successful aging will therefore have a significant impact. Historically, the concept of successful aging has been operationalized by objective markers such as the freedom from disease and disability, high physical and cognitive functioning, and social and productive engagement (Rowe & Khan, 1997). Recent research has aimed to determine subjective interpretations of what constitutes successful aging in order to provide a holistic perspective of aging that better accounts for lifestyle factors and psychological functioning (Jeste et al., 2010; Jeste et al., 2013). These elements include greater physical activity, fewer medical conditions, and absence from disability, arthritis, and diabetes (Depp & Jeste, 2006). In regard to psychological functioning and lifestyle factors, greater cognitive ability, increased social supports, the absence of depression, higher levels of education, productive engagement, access to wellness resources, valued relationships, religious activity, and high perceived meaningfulness were associated with successful aging (Depp & Jeste, 2006; Sunsanti et al., 2020). While physical health impairments and medical concerns are more prominent in the older adult population, psychological factors such as optimism and resilience have been shown to be more important for defining self-identified successful aging than physical functioning (Jeste et al., 2013). Similarly, psychiatric illnesses have been found to directly impact biological aging trajectories by diminishing psychosocial factors (e.g., variables related to lifestyle, psychological health, and social functioning) that would otherwise reduce risk of morbidity and mortality (Harmell et al., 2014).

Amazon Prime Video: Bosch

It has taken me a while, but I finally arrived at the Bosch site on Amazon Prime Video. Hieronymous “Harry” Bosch, a robbery/homicide detective in the Hollywood Division of the Los Angeles Police Department, is a quirky, irreverent, and brilliant police officer. Essentially a rule of law man, Bosch frequently walks on the edge of police regulations in order to obtain justice. Harry’s most famous line is “Everybody counts or nobody counts”. The outspoken Bosch is a character who never grows old. Titus Welliver, the actor who plays Detective Bosch, embodies elements of Bogart, Brando, and DeNiro. The seven seasons of Bosch and the three seasons of its sequel Bosch Legacy can both be seen on Amazon Prime Video. An additional sequel is in the works. This show deserves to be seen and ranks among the best series ever made.