November 2022

Joy

bringing joy in a bucket
by the barn
near the meadow
filled and warmed by the sun
untouched by dark clouds
protected for another day

Falling Father, Falling Daughter

The right disaster comes
at the right moment
to break us open to the helplessness
that an opening of the heart requires.
-Coleman Barks

It has been three months since I have been home to see my father. I have been busy living my own cluttered life two hours away. Thursday afternoon, when he wakes from his nap to find me there in his living room, I am familiar; there is recognition in his eyes, but also blurriness. “Who’s this?” he asks.

“Honey, it’s Mary Ann, your daughter.” This is a weird, unwelcome feeling, to be not fully known by him.

Mary Ann Stratton grew up the youngest of six children on a small farm in southern Colorado where her father was a state veterinarian. She is currently living in Denver, Colorado where she teaches middle school Language Arts. This article was originally published in the San Diego Psychologist.

Delizioso

Here is a dish that is very tasty and easy to make. Buy some thin chicken cutlets at your local grocery store. At home pound your cutlets with a wooden mallet to make them thin and tender. Then set out two large bowls. In one mix two eggs. In another add a cup of Italian seasoned breadcrumbs along with a half cup of parmesan cheese. Add some garlic salt, seasoned salt and basil. Add a little white vinegar (it makes a big difference).

Dip the cutlets in the eggs and then through the breadcrumb mixture.

Place some Extra Virgin Olive Oil in a large frying pan and heat up. When the oil is sizzling, place the cutlets in the pan. They will cook in a few minutes each side.

Serve with Italian potatoes, and you have a great meal!

Legacies

People, as they age, begin to worry about their legacy. How will they be remembered? Will they be seen as having lived a life of value and consequence? Will they be appreciated for having lived a life of purpose and accomplishment? Were they a good worker? A good spouse? A creative person?

Of course, their curiosity is doomed to failure since they won’t be around to see how their legacy plays out. In addition, our legacies are experienced differently by different people. Here is an example.

Everything I Needed to Know about Retirement I Learned in Middle School

I was a 7th-grade English teacher at a suburban Massachusetts middle school for 29 years (plus four years teaching in Maine in the 70s). Many people questioned how I could teach 12 and 13-year-olds for so long, but the truth was, I loved my job! Indeed, there were good days and bad days, good years and years that seemed endless, but there was never any doubt in my mind that I loved that age group. Their energy was boundless, and I loved the silliness and goofiness. However, while I know I prepared them for 8^th grade, high school, and beyond, ultimately, they are the ones who prepared me for retirement. I officially retired on June 30, 2019, and the lessons of being around preteens and “new teens” continue to navigate me through my first retirement years.

Pat Dumas is a retired middle school teacher currently living in Cranston, Rhode Island.

Great Breakfast!

The Grill at Torrey Pines at The Lodge at Torrey Pines offers a great breakfast. Sit on the terrace, watch the struggling golfers, and enjoy a fabulous eggs benedict or huevos rancheros dish.

There is free valet parking at the Lodge.

Reservations are usually needed on weekends.

Hey Senior Travelers!

Do you have a passport?
Do you have a Global Reentry Card?
Do you have trip insurance?
Do you have luggage on wheels?
Have you left ample time between connecting flights?
Have you considered upgrading to Business Class using miles?
Do friends and family have your itinerary?
Have you thought of breaking up long flights? For example, if you are flying to Paris from San Diego, consider staying a day or two in New York or Boston to make jet lag easier and reduce the burnout from flying 12 hours!
Have you thought of using trains and drivers instead of renting a car in Europe?
Have you thought of staying in hotels vs. Airbnbs that don’t have concierges?

Stretch, Stretch, Stretch

Psychologists are prone to back and tendon problems. We sit all day, and often our bodies are tense. Stretching helps bring a sense of well-being in addition to preventing injuries. The beauty of stretching is that you can do some form of a stretch anywhere. You can find many programs on the Internet.

Fore!

I have talked with some friends who have thought about taking up golf in retirement. If you enjoy being outdoors, hitting a ball around without much concern about how competent you become, then do it. See an instructor, get some tips on clubs, take a few lessons and go for it! Whether one takes up the sport or not depends greatly on who you are.

On the other hand, if you want to be a good player who is competitive with peers, give the decision some thought. Unless you are a gifted athlete, you can count on hours of practice and instruction at times without too much progress. Taking on the game takes a considerable time and financial commitment. It is an exciting game that can be very satisfying, but it is daunting.